Tag Archives: cliches

In which I am more puritanical than I think I am…

This is hardly enough of a thought to make a post, but it keeps coming up and I’m just going to put it out there.

I don’t think of myself as a prude. I don’t think people who know me do either. I like sexy books and sexy movies. I have this thing for “foul” language and the way it’s used for posturing, to show passion, for the ways it can be amusing. Etc. I’m not going to spend all day building up my freak cred here. Point: not a prude.

“Gird my loins”

I don’t know why this phrase bothers me. I would not use it. I don’t want to talk to anyone about my loins, and I’m certainly not going say, “I have something really difficult to do, so I’m going to go provide the region around my pelvis with extra protection.”

This is not something you need to know.

Also, as much as I try to be a modern woman (and, come on, if you’ve read Joss, and her relationship with Dylan, you’ve got to believe that I’m as feminist as the next person), I find that I’m not only puritanical but sexist, because I find it especially disturbing (if I had a word that meant a very low level of shockingly vulgar, that’s what I’d use here) when women say this. We women are definitely not supposed to be talking about…that area…and certainly not in mixed company!

Maybe I need to lay off the period drama…

So what about you? It’s just me, right? No one else is taking all this talk of loins as literally as I am, no one else is bothered by it, and, like many a Puritan, I’m just hyper focused on anatomy and have a dirty mind.

Okay, so if the rampant girding of loins doesn’t bother you, make a girl feel better and tell me what common cliche does bother you even though it doesn’t seem to bother anyone else.

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“Yeah, I saw that in 6 music videos and a Gap ad.”

Ok, maybe that’s not exactly what SJP said in “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”, but if you know what I’m talking about then you know that it’s more about how she said it and that what she was saying was: dude, that dance move is so played.

So I’m talking about cliches.  God do I have reader fatigue.  And it’s not fair because I love to read.  Now I understand that “we’re in the middle of a like totally wasted decade; all the great themes have been used up, turned into theme parks…”  Actually, that was last decade, wasn’t it?

Anyway, make it new!

Do not, under any circumstances, think that it’s ok to take a played plot from one genre and plunk it down into another with barely anything changed.  It’s just not.

On a related topic–related to what I spent 3 hours reading today before just plain giving up–

Food fights and throwing each other into creeks is not conflict.

Middles full of fluffy scenes like that are so not what I want to read, and when the blurb promises that the book is going to be about something, it’s just all the more annoying.  Marshmallow filling in the middle is for Twinkies, not for novels.

But then, maybe some people are into that.  I don’t know.  Or maybe, like me, they just keep reading anything in search of something good, and just anything keeps getting published with the knowledge that people like us just keep reading.

/rant.

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Filed under rant, what not to do